Candles for Bereaving Families

The Compassionate Friends - Worldwide Candle Lighting

Yesterday I heard about another candle lighting event of which I am sure many of you have not heard. At least I had not.

On the Second Sunday in December (Dec 9 this year), thousands of groups of people around the world with a commonality that none would choose to be a part, meet.

Losing a child is one of the most painful emotions and experiences one could ever experience. Those bereaved are often affected for a long time and have difficulty in arriving at closure and the ability to positively move on. The first birthday and first Christmas without the child are very difficult and emotions can override and negatively affect future events for other siblings or family members.

A world wide candle lighting Ceremony orchestrated by Compassionate Friends Worldwide brings families and friends together to commemorate and honor children they have lost (especially in the last year) so they will not be forgotten and so that those left behind will not be left in deep depression and gloom. The mission of The Compassionate Friends is to assist families toward the positive resolution of grief following the death of a child of any age and to provide information to help others be supportive. (You can find them on the web.)

A candle signifies life and light and so the burning of a candle brings light and life to the memory and to the hearts of the bereaved. It is not that a candle has any magical or mystical powers as it is not the candle itself that heals. The lighting of a small candle in the darkness somehow helps you to draw aside from the blaring distractions. It brings an err of calm and helps you focus on what is important at that time. Something very special happens when a large group lights candles. A feeling of unity and oneness occurs.

A large group in one accord with a positive outlook, give enormous support and a sense of community and togetherness where otherwise there may be a huge sense of being alone and isolated. We human beings need each other especially in our darkest hours. When you cannot hold yourself up, a caring friend can make all the difference.

But for me, times of grief and sadness can only really be healed in the presence my Heavenly Father. I pray that those who have lost a child this year will come to know Him and His comfort and peace.

I am also urged to become more connected with my children and to make every day count for they are precious gifts from the Lord, loaned to us for but a season….and we never know how long that will be.